Worming from Home

Your job is simple on paper: answer messages, fill out spreadsheets, answer the phone occasionally. The catch is that you have no hands, no spine and no business being at a desk. So you throw your whole body at the keyboard, bashing your head against the keys until the letters come out and your boss is convinced work is happening.

The ragdoll physics make every task a small physical comedy. You launch yourself across the desk, land somewhere unplanned, and try again. One moment you are dragging a signed contract to the printer; the next you are flung into oblivion because your body got stuck in the paper. It should be tedious. Somehow it just keeps being funny.

The promotion does not come from typing alone. You invest your earnings in the stock market, which the game cheerfully lets you do with insider information, because apparently worms are not bound by securities law. Later you hire interns who generate passive income while you do, ideally, nothing at all.

Along the way you buy upgrades that make worm life easier: better equipment, furniture, whatever helps you pretend to be a human employee a little more convincingly. The progression starts with basic 2+2 spreadsheets and ends with you as a proper Wall Street worm buying up companies. It is a satire of corporate climbing where the corporate climber is two inches long and lives in dirt.