$2.99Chushpan Simulator From bottles to king of the world
Start on the street in Uryupinsk with empty pockets, collect bottles, take jobs, fight, and choose how far up you climb.
Is Chushpan Simulator worth it?
Chushpan Simulator is worth it if…
- you want a short, silly evening game that takes itself exactly as seriously as it should
- you enjoy meme humor, absurd tasks and dialogue that never stops joking
- you like life sims where the moral choices actually change where you end up
- you want an open world small enough to finish, fights included, in one sitting
Screenshots
One long climb, your choices at every rung
You begin in a poor apartment as a man without anything, and the game hands the ladder over to you. Collecting garbage and handing in bottles earns your first money and a step up to a new social level. From there the paths split: earn small but honest wages as a watchman, make a name for yourself in street fights, or steal products and resell them on the black market. The quest chain runs through different locations, and along the way you face moral choices that decide which of several endings you get. The story is short, but it bends around what you do, and the endings lean darker and more thoughtful than the jokes suggest.
An open town built for nonsense
Uryupinsk is a proper open world to wander, from courtyards and garages to shops and a gym, with a distinct 90s-to-present atmosphere and a soundtrack that fits it. The quest list reads like a dare: go to the shop for eggs, bring beer to uncle Tolya, swap a dollar, hit the gym. Between tasks you can brawl with gopniks, whack the hogweed with a stick, or kick a ball around in a penalty box. Nearly every character is voiced, the dialogue is packed with memes and references, and the humor runs through everything, from item names to the tasks themselves. It is rough around the edges, and that roughness is part of the joke.
How long does a playthrough take?
How long does a playthrough take?
It is a short game. Players commonly finish the main story in around two to three hours, and the whole script is compact. That makes it an easy one-evening play, especially since your choices lead to different endings, so a second run down another path is where most of the extra time goes.
Do your choices really matter?
Yes. The quest chain offers moral choices at several points, and they determine which of several endings you receive. The endings are not all cheerful: the story can land somewhere surprisingly sober and philosophical once the jokes stop.
What do you actually do day to day?
A bit of everything the street offers. You collect bottles and hand them in for cash, run errands from a paper quest list, work as a watchman for honest money, or go the criminal route stealing products to resell. Street fights and boxing are always an option when talking stops working.
Can you play it solo?
Yes, it is a singleplayer game from start to finish, with a save system so you can pick up your climb whenever you like.
